Construction Site!

A house down the street from ours in undergoing some MAJOR renovations-- they're adding an entire second floor, a driveway, and what looks like two more rooms on the main floor (I'm nosy). We wandered down to check out the progress the other night.

The little guy meant business, but the baby stopped to collect some leaves along the way.

This was also the point that I realized she had melted M&Ms smeared all over her face from dessert. Whoops!

Traumatized

The little guy wanted me to read him stories before bed tonight. Usually Eric does it, so I was honored and excited. He let me pick one, so I chose "Are you my mother?"-- it's a great little story about a baby bird who hatches when his mother is away from the nest. He searches for his mom, asking all the other animals if they are his mom and they all say no. The little guy got really quiet about halfway through. His eyes were as big as saucers and he was REALLY UPSET about the missing mother and the poor bird who doesn't have a mom. I think he got his hopes up for each animal, and was just as disappointed as the stupid little bird when the cow wasn't his mom. Whoops! I tried reading really fast to get to the happy ending... but I think I traumatized the poor kid. No wonder he prefers Eric at bedtime.

I didn't take a trauma-photo, so here's one of our calm, quiet evening at home.

Please note the foolishness in the background.

More Trains!

The little booger tore up his old train track and stacked up all the pieces yesterday. We started on a new track tonight. I've got big ideas for this one-- I'm trying to figure out a bi-level, figure-eight track.

The little stinkpot is getting in on the planning, too. This is SO MUCH FUN!! (for me)

He seems to be enjoying it, too.

The Table Is Pink

We almost finished our dining room table this weekend... It needs a couple more coats of paint, but it is done enough to use. I told the little booger we had a new table when he woke up from his nap on Saturday. He came downstairs and said "It's pink!"

It sure is. (I love it!)

"A lady's imagination...

is very rapid; it jumps from admiration to love, from love to matrimony, in a moment." Pride and Prejudice, Jane Austen.

I was over at our new church space helping set up the sound and video equipment tonight.  The work ran over and I came home to find my wife lying on the couch in very comfy clothes and watching a movie; Pride and Prejudice (the Keira Knightly version).  This is not all that unusual, though most times the marathon A&E version is the one of choice.  What's awesome is that I had to point out she was wearing this sweatshirt to watch that movie.

...There is also a hardback version on her night stand right now and a travel size in her suit case (le sigh).  

Oh and just so you know, Mr. Darcy would have never walked into the house uninvited like that.  It just wasn't done.

Safety?

Our super-secure baby gates definitely contain the little dude-- but because they are kind of a pain to open, we (the taller members of the family) usually just climb over them. I have to stand on my tiptoes to make it over-- and I almost fell down the stairs last night (so dumb). I didn't learn a thing, though, because here I am setting a bad example for the little guy tonight.

Fetch!

One of my biggest disappointments in life has been that neither of our dogs will play fetch (ok-- I've been pretty blessed). But who needs the dogs to play fetch when my kid will?

Life is good, my friends.

I'm a Slacker with Big Dreams

Tomorrow is a dress-up day at daycare. The theme is Camelot. (No, I'm not kidding.) We went to four or five stores last week in search of a costume with no success. I've already packed my sewing machine, so even if I had the time or the inclination to sew something for him, I can't.

Instead, we stopped by Burger King tonight and got a crown at the drive-thru. My plan was for the little dude to decorate it with some stickers that we had around the house. I was pretty sure we could get it to look like this because I am, frankly, delusional.

He had a fantastic time decorating the crown. He put almost all the stickers on by himself!

Here is our finished masterpiece (and yes, his entire Camelot costume is a cardboard crown with yin yang stickers on it):

I'm glad we did this-- it was a lot of fun, but wow-- I am no Martha Stewart.

What a Sucker!

I'm talking about me-- I'm a total sucker for a fun t-shirt. The nice thing is that I can buy them for the little stinker now, too (or instead). Check out what I picked up for him at the Milwaukee airport on a layover:

Best. Shirt. Ever.

How Not to Talk to Your 16-Month Old

I was going to write about the little dude's new silverware (riveting, I know), but then he did this:

What isn't in the video is the conversation that followed him ignoring my initial request. In the dialog below, he is LS (for Little Stinker), and I'm Me.

Me: Hey, can you close that please?

LS: (completely ignores me)

Me: Hey, can you close the door please?

LS: (continues to ignore me, turns some knobs)

Me: LS, can you please close that door?

LS: (pushes a button, giggles to himself)
 
Me: Hey, LS, can you please close the door?

LS: (looks at door, smiles at me) Door!

Me: Yes, door! Can you please close the door and play with something else, like your car?

LS: (points to window, smiles at me) Car!

Me: No, no. Your toy car. It's right there (points) at your feet.

LS: (points to and stamps his feet-- grinning like he's trying to say 'Feet! These are my feet!')

This is where I got up and closed the door. It's nice that he understands so many words, but this was one of the least productive conversations I've ever had. Happy 16 months!

Stink-eye

The little guy is sooooo cute when he gets in his crib and stuffs his mouth full of blanket. The problem is that he's not a huge fan of flash-photography at bedtime.

Who would have thought? Toddlers... as easily annoyed as grown-ups!

What am I doing?

Sometimes I don't think I've learned a thing in my almost-15-months of parenting.

Even the little dude looks surprised that I don't have a handle on carrying a baby and a snack.

Most Obnoxious Toy Ever?

First of all, Merry Christmas from the little guy. Here he is cheesing from a small box amid the morning wreckage:

We (I) got the little dude a ball-popper for Christmas. The good news is that his aunt and uncle who got him a percussion set (seriously) don't have to worry about being blacklisted. The ball-popper is quite possibly more loud and annoying... but he loves it!

What was I thinking?

Treeburns!

Our church had an Ugly-Christmas-Sweater/Mustache/Cookie-Exchange potluck last night (we get a lot done in one party, what can I say?) and the little dude's dad had a creative idea for his sideburns:

When I took the clippers to his face to create the treeburns, the little dude threw a fit! He totally panicked and ran over, grabbed his daddy's legs and wailed. He even tried to push me away. It was tragic. He was ok with his dad clipping his own face, but I don't think he trusted me not to kill somebody. Once we got the little guy a big snack he calmed right down. It's nice to know he prioritizes food over his dad's neck.

Heart Attack in the Making

The little guy looooooves the stairs. His favorite thing to do is play on the landing. It gives me heart palpitations. Here he is sliding down then climbing up the stairs. He's gotten really fast at going downstairs, and you can see how proud of himself he is at the end.

Also, here he is trying to give me a complete heart attack.

Did you see that look he gave me? He's all "Geez, mom, calm down." The attitude on this one is unreal. And why am I apologizing to a baby for trying to save his life? *sigh*

Not so cute, actually...

My parents got the little guy an adorable wooden giraffe for his birthday. It has all of these elastic joints so you can reposition it. I really like how it's cute and wholesome in an old-fashioned kind of way. The little dude enjoys playing with it, too. See? Awwww.

It all seemed so idyllic... until I watched the little dude deliberately bend the giraffe's neck in half. Ouch!

Then he held the giraffe by its head and slapped its limp body against the beagle's crate.  Yikes!

That's kind of disturbing!

Why I Should Not Be Left Alone with This Child, Part 1

I love to dip my grilled-cheese sandwiches in barbecue sauce. The little dude has eaten barbecue before (and baked beans, which is barbecue-ish) and loved it. I've read that toddlers like to dip their food in sauce. Plus, he had (really mild) honey-mustard sauce on chicken last week and it was a hit.

So, tonight I gave him cheese-toast with a side of barbecue sauce for dinner. He stuck his hand in the sauce, licked his fingers, and seemed happy... so it was going well, right? This is the kid who eats almost anything, right? Yup. Until he started crying and clawing at his tongue. The sauce was apparently a little hotter than I thought it was. Continuing my streak of pure genius, I gave him a piece of toast that I had already dipped in the sauce. That made it worse, of course. (Duh.) Then I gave him some water, which obviously didn't help out either.

Finally I grabbed a yogurt out of the fridge-- he didn't want milk since the water was ineffective. The yogurt worked, thank goodness, and he calmed down. What the heck was I thinking?

Here he is finishing his peas after all was forgiven:

He never did eat the rest of his cheese-toast. I think this was my worst idea yet!

Best Idea Ever/Worst Execution Possible

The little guy totally walks like a zombie- arms out, legs stiff. It's hilarious. So I had the AMAZING idea to wrap him in toilet paper and film him walking. Awesome, right? Even better if he did his "Aahhhhh" sound... total one-year-old zombie. First of all, wrapping an uncooperative toddler in t.p. is harder than it appears. He kept squirming and trying to rip it off and feed it to the beagle. Then he wouldn't walk. I gave up, and was roundly mocked.

It really was a great idea, I promise!

The child I deserve?

The first time my long-suffering mother bought me shoes, I laid on the floor at the shoe store holding my feet and crying. My own darling child has never been too thrilled with shoes either. We've just let him go barefoot so far, but he really needs some shoes for the winter. Here he is, standing up in his new shoes and socks. Then he realized that something wasn't right.
   

It only took him about five seconds to get rid of the first shoe.

Why yes, that is my bare foot right next to him... why do you ask?

Books!

The little guy has weaned (sob), so our new bedtime routine involves reading some board books together.  He's getting pretty good at turning the pages, but his sense of timing needs work. 

It's a good thing there aren't a lot of words on each page and the plot is minimal because he rarely goes through the book the right usual way.  He seems to randomly combine skipping a bunch of pages and going through the book backwards.  For some reason I feel compelled to read each page out loud as he turns to it.  It makes the stories a little choppy, and sometimes I really have to rush (or guess at what the page says).  "Who says quack? Cows say moo. Not a hen. Look! A dog! Cows say moo. Cock-a-doodle-doo. Cows say moo. Who says quack?"